


The Visitor

by Nikky_the_writer



Category: Vikings (TV)
Genre: F/M, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-11
Updated: 2019-01-23
Packaged: 2019-09-12 14:25:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 18,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16874553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nikky_the_writer/pseuds/Nikky_the_writer
Summary: Reader has had dreams about unknown man for a while, what will happen when after terrifying nightmare Reader starts seeing him almost everywhere? For how long will the unknown man keep his distance? - AUWarnings: cursing, blood, violence, smut





	1. Chapter 1

_˝What are you thinking about?˝ You asked observing him. He was sitting on the bed next to your lying form. His legs were stretched out covered with warm furs as you were lazily tracing patterns on his lower abdomen.  
_

_˝This is strange for me.˝ He admitted with his eyes still closed not knowing how to say out loud the darkest thoughts that were occupying his head for a quite some time._

_˝Being married?˝ Your eyes never left his face as you lifted your upper body on your elbows. Seeing him shaking his head you let out a breath you weren’t even aware you were holding. It passed a few more moments before he decided to break the silence._

_˝Being happy.˝ He slowly opened his eyes looking down at you. He could see a frown gracing your face and he knew that he will have to explain._

_˝I don’t understand. You were happy before, we have grown up together, we have fought together. Didn’t that make you happy?˝ You asked with a sad smile remembering what you both have been through together._

_˝It did, love. But now you are my wife, my queen and for the first time in my life I don’t have a need to prove myself.˝_

_You understood what he meant, but you could also see that something was bothering him. ˝You have doubts because of it.˝_

_˝Yes, what if the Gods decide to take it all from me, to take you from me?˝ He asked sincerely. He was in many battles. He saw people die, his family, his brothers and he also saw you getting hurt. What he had now was a reward for all he has done, but he doubted himself. He thought that to the Gods his winnings will never be enough that one day he will be left alone as he thought he will be while he was young._

_˝They would never punish their best warrior, the one who holds great respect for them and the one who never doubted them. I won’t be taken from you, not me and not our child after all king needs his queen and his heir. We will forever stand by you.˝ By the time you stopped talking you were already sitting in his lap with your palms on his cheeks. You moved your thumb over the scar on his cheek before smiling at him. ˝And our child will be great like his father.˝_

_His hand was placed on your thigh while he pressed his other on your barely visible swollen stomach._

_˝Do you promise?˝ He asked moving his hand higher on your naked body._

_˝I promise you forever, even after we die we will be together with you in Valhalla.˝_

_He held his forehead pressed to yours with his lips hovering close. ˝I know that I don’t say it often, but you have to know that I love you.˝ He pressed his lips against your soft ones while pressing you closer to his body. You immediately responded sneaking your hand to the back of his neck to move your fingers through his thick hair while you kept the other in its place. Before he could deepen the kiss you pulled away staring into his deep blue eyes that became your safe place, just looking at them felt like home._

_˝You don’t have to say it with words, you show it to me every day with your actions.˝ You whispered still close to his lips and he didn’t waste any time after you spoke those words before he kissed you again. Deepening the kiss his hands wondered to your breasts squeezing them softly and earning a moan to escape your lips. He kept touching you before he started pulling away biting your bottom lip drawing out a few drops of your warm blood that he quickly licked away._

_He focused on your breasts placing butterfly kisses on each before biting into the soft flesh leaving a wet trail on them. While all the time his fingers moved over your swollen stomach making him smile every time when he would touch it._

_He was a passionate lover always wanting you close after a battle before you could even clean the blood from yourself, but since he found out that you were with a child he would slow his movements. It is not that he was too rough with you usually; he always made sure that you were comfortable with everything, but since he found out the news he told you that now you both have to be more comfortable, so he was gentle. Just as he was being at the moment with soft touches and lingering kisses while you were slowly moving your hips against his already hard prick._

_˝Lay back˝, he whispered under his breath and you almost missed it._

_˝Are you sure, this is usually the best position for your legs.˝ You said quietly although you were alone you both kept your voices down at the moment._

_˝Actually they don’t ache today and I really want to taste you, so..˝, He bit his lower lip smiling at you ˝…on your back, my queen.˝_

_And that was the start that night. He and you made love until you both fell asleep in each other arms not aware of what the Gods have planned for you._

* * *

You rolled on your side in the bed throwing the heavy covers off your overheated body.

˝Who are you?˝ You whispered in the darkness of your bedroom while sating up. Your oversized shirt was wet from your sweat and was clinging onto you.

That dream was being frequent, it started happening a few weeks ago, but it never got this far. Usually, you would always wake up during the conversation, but tonight it happened more than that and you could scream from frustration. You wanted those dreams to stop because they freaked you out being so real and always fresh in your memory. Until the dreams of the unknown man whose name was never spoken or yours on that matter, you were never able to remember everything from the dream. Usually, the memories of the dreams would fade by the time you get out your bed and maybe a piece or two would stay in your mind until the lunchtime and then they would be gone. However, this man was always there in your mind, every moment between you was memorized and it scared you. He scared you and that is why you had to go through your day telling yourself that he wasn’t real. Every time when you would say that to yourself you could hear his voice telling you to keep your promise. But how could you keep a promise to the man from your dreams? He wasn’t real, he was just a part of your imagination, or was he?

 

You quickly walked to the shower throwing your clothes on your way. After the cold water hit your back you finally let yourself to take a deep breath relaxing your muscles. Before your dreams, you would close your eyes in the shower, but now you can’t; now his presence is closer to you when you do so. The worst part of it was that you lived alone not even owning a pet because it’s not allowed in the building and you hardly had anyone to talk to about it. You had a good friend, but you knew that she would just tell you to enjoy it because you don’t get any in your real life. She would even tell you that you are boring and that the man will probably stop coming in your dreams getting sick of you. She, Darcy is not a bad person, but she is easy going and always relaxed while you weren’t. You could be sarcastic and cocky, but you mostly keep to yourself in the restaurant that you were managing for your father. But after what happened today and after so long that it was happening, you decided to seek from her an advice or even see a therapist. 

* * *

The restaurant wasn’t still open so you and Darcy sat together at the table eating while going through the menu. You always had to make sure that everything was in the best edition. On most days you would help in the kitchen while sometimes you had to manage the crowd that would gather in the evening hours although you had people for that job.

You were ready to take another bit of mozzarella stick when Darcy started speaking.

˝You seem out of your element?˝ She glanced at you suspiciously but worried.

˝What do you mean?˝

˝I’ve noticed it before, but I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable. You seem paranoid lately, is somebody bothering you?˝ She placed her palm over your hand as she noticed how your eyes were getting watery.

˝It’s really stupid; I mean there is nobody real. It..˝ You tried to explain before she interrupted you.

˝Please, tell me that is not some internet perv that ..˝

˝No, God, no, Darc.˝ You pulled your hand away placing your both hands on your thighs nervously tugging at the material of your pants.

Darcy waited for you to tell her what was happening pulling the piece of her dark red hair behind her ear.

˝I’ve been having these weird dreams. It’s been the same dream over and over again with the man I have never seen before.˝

˝You got me scared for nothing, girl. I thought you’ve been stalked or some shit and you are worried about the dream with some hottie?˝ She laughed picking at the food on her plate.

You expected that kind of reaction from her so you regret telling her anything. You avoided her eyes staring out the window on the street; you only glanced at her when she called your name.

˝What, Darc, you want to laugh at me more?˝ You snapped at her.

˝Look you have to admit that the dream is not something over what you should be panicking.˝ Her brown eyes looked at you while you were trying to calm down. ˝At least tell me what happens to you in them? Does he kill you, is that why you are scared?˝ Her voice was lower than before like she was talking to a child as she was aware of what could be your reaction.

˝No, he….he. There is no killing or anything like that.˝

˝Oh my God, does he rape you in the dream?˝ Darcy asked hoping for a negative answer because she knew some people who had those dreams and they had to go to therapy after it although it didn’t happen in the real life their fear was real.

˝No, he is actually nice. He seems caring and like he loves me, but his presence hunts me.˝

˝You had sex with him, didn’t you?˝ She smirked at you. ˝Look I’m being serious just let it happen, you are not getting laid in real life than fuck a hot guy in dreams. Nobody will know except me, but you have to give me some name for him so that I can talk about him and his experience.˝ She winked at you, but her smile quickly dropped as she saw that your gaze was on something behind her and she has never seen you so frightened in your whole life that she knew you.

˝Y/N, what’s going on?˝ She asked quietly as if somebody could hear her in an empty restaurant. Her chair was placed next to the window and she was scared to turn around because the hairs on her neck rose. ˝What is..˝

˝He is behind you˝, your voice was like a whisper.

She could see a tear falling from your eye and in that moment Darcy realized that you had every right to be scared.

 


	2. Chapter 2

Two weeks had passed since the day you saw the man from your dreams and still, you had to assure yourself that he wasn’t real. It helped that Darcy didn’t see anyone when she turned around so the only explanation was that you were probably tired and imagining it and you almost believed it until yesterday. Even before yesterday, you were on the edge; although you haven’t seen that man again you had dreams every night. 

You thought that they were the same, but the details in them were different every night from the room interior all the way to the content of the conversation that seemed same but it wasn’t. It took you long to notice it, but no matter how much details you noticed or tried to understand what it meant the man always stayed the same. Although the things in the room changed what it seemed to you through years he was still young looking the same as you were. You tried hard not to let anything from the dreams to get to you, but something did. The first thing was that when in one dream you were pregnant your belly was round with child inside and you woke up you could feel the loss, you even found yourself crying on the floor.

But it all changed yesterday until yesterday you didn’t know how dreams could be so vivid. You tried to be honest with yourself; you tried to make yourself believe that it wasn’t real. You failed and that it is why you haven’t returned to your apartment since you woke up yesterday, fortunately, Darcy offered you to stay with her and right now you were sleeping in the bed beside her too scared to sleep alone because what happened to you seemed so real.

* * *

_You were woken up by the sound of closing doors and your heart almost stopped. In the building, there were only three apartments on your floor and one was empty for more than two months and in the other lived a nurse who is never home at night. The only explanation would be that somebody maybe moved next door, which is crazy because nobody moves at 4 am, also that nurse could have come home but the closing of the doors wouldn’t be so loud because she lives the furthest away. So, unfortunately, you were left with only one possible explanation and that was that somebody was inside your home. Your suspicion was only confirmed after a few moments of silence when you heard the sound of something being dragged on the floor. Sitting on your bed you tried to think of what to do, but your brain didn’t want to cooperate. There were so many possibilities however, you couldn’t even move from your bed as the sound only grew louder. Looking your surroundings you felt disappointed there was nothing in this room that could help you even your phone wasn’t there. The possibilities of jumping out the window were a firm no, knowing that it would end up with you dying, however, for a moment you considered it._

_Your breathing got louder as you finally managed to place your feet on the cold ground. You debated if you should even try to hide inside your closet because anyone would look there first. However, when the dragging stopped in front of your room you quickly moved to your closet the quiet as you could. The only thing that was left for you now was to wait. If something like this happened before all those dreams you would be ready for a fight, but at the moment you were too shaken to do anything, even to think straight._

_Placing your palm over your mouth you tried to calm your breathing, but it only got louder when the doors from your room opened. From your position in the closet and barely any light in your room, you couldn’t see who entered the room. Closing your eyes you tried not to cry, you tried to keep it together, but you were in such a bad state of mind. You only could think about that man that hunts your dreams. The sound of dragging reached your ears and you let out a silent cry. The tears were already rolling down your cheeks as you held your knees close to your chest._

_The creaking sound of the closet forced you to open your eyes only to be met with blue eyes that stood out in the darkness surrounded by blood and dirt that was covering his face._

_˝Are you afraid of me?˝_

_You could hear the pain in his voice and that was some strange feeling inside you. Not saying anything you kept your palm over your mouth while your body was shaking as you were crying._

_˝Why are you afraid?˝ Sitting on the ground next to the closet he reached towards your face and you tried to move away, but your back hit the firm surface that didn’t let you move any further._

_He slowly placed his fingers around your wrist moving your palm away so that he could see your face. He let his fingers to touch the skin wiping away your tears. ˝Don’t cry, we were promised one life and we will have it.˝_

_You tried to say something, anything, but every time when you would part your lips no words came out._

_After few moments of tracing your features with the tips of his fingers, he pulled his hand back. Lifting himself little off the ground he sat beside you pulling you into his arms. He held you close to his chest while your body still shook, but after a few more moments you were starting to calm down in his embrace._

_˝This time will be the right one. This time we will grow old together as it was promised. You and me, love.˝ He spoke kissing the top of your head while moving his fingers through your hair to calm you down. ˝Soon, love.˝ Not long after you fall asleep in the arms of the man whose name you still didn’t know._

* * *

You wouldn’t be on the edge from that morning if it started as every other, the thing was that you didn’t wake up in your bed in the morning; you woke up in your closet. There was nobody around you or any indication that somebody was there, but still, you had to ask yourself how you ended up inside your closet.

Darcy hated seeing you on the edge. You have been staying with her for four days refusing to leave her apartment and she had it enough. She tried to believe you, but she just couldn’t understand it. If she didn’t know you she would assume that you were on some kind of drugs. Darcy was never the one in your relationship that took things seriously often, however she decided that this time she has to be serious and that she has to persuade you to face the reality. It couldn’t be possible that somebody was stalking you and that you dream about them. She was sure that nobody would ever choose to stalk you no matter how cruel it sounded because you never leave your apartment except to work that is just down the street from your home. In her eyes it wasn’t possible, you weren’t a type of person that comes in contact with a lot of people only when you have to at the restaurant and that’s it.

* * *

˝You have to leave today.˝ Those were the first words that Darcy said after entering her apartment when she came home from work. You were standing in her kitchen making chocolate lava cake because you refused to go outside.

˝I can’t˝, your voice was a pitch higher than usual from the panic that her words caused.

Darcy stepped closer to the counter facing you. You looked so lost in her eyes, tugging the edge of your chocolate covered shirt.

˝This is not healthy, the restaurant needs you and you have your own place. There is nobody after you, that day I thought that maybe there was someone, but there aren’t. You are having too great of imagination what you think you see is in your head because you are obsessed with your dreams. You have to come back to reality.˝ Darcy placed her hand on your shoulder, but you only lowered your head feeling ashamed and also betrayed.

˝What is the point in having you as a best friend when you don’t trust me?˝ You said under your breath stepping away from her.

Darcy’s eyes grew wide hearing your words; her intention wasn’t to make you feel like she doesn’t trust you. ˝Where are you going?˝ She asked as you headed to the bedroom.

˝I’m going to pack, I’m not welcome here anymore.˝

˝Don’t say that˝

˝You said it.˝ You shrugged and before you closed the door you turned around only saying: ˝Cake should be done in five minutes.˝

* * *

You quickly packed, but you did drag the returning to your apartment and to make everything even worse it was dark outside. Luckily Darcy didn’t live too far away so you quickly walked home refusing for her to came with you. With every step that you took, you looked at your surroundings. There was something in your gut telling you to run while you were walking on the wet pavement in the deserted street. The hairs on your neck were raised and your heart beats went wild and then you heard it, the almost silent steps behind you. You quickened your pace almost starting to run. You felt relief seeing the doors of your building quickly grabbing the key while hurrying towards it. Although your hands were shaking you managed to open the building door quickly closing it behind you. Turning around to face the outside of the building you were faced with the blue eyes, the same blue eyes that were earlier surrounded by blood. You could already feel your tears rolling down as you backed away from the doors.

You thought that you won’t make it to your apartment, fortunately, you have. Although your building had an elevator you decided to run. After closing the door and checking the locks, more precisely four of them that you bought recently you grabbed the chair from next to your dining table putting the back of the chair under the knob. You left your bag in the kitchen and you took the aluminum baseball bat, also newly bought and you sat on the ground in front of the door and only thing that you could do now except calling the police was to wait so you waited.


	3. Chapter 3

_˝What are you doing?˝, you laughed staring at the boy you knew since you were little._

_˝Nothing˝, he was lying close to the water with his fingers grazing the clear water that was crushing slowly into the stones at the shore._

_You could hear in his voice that he was sad because of something and you immediately cursed knowing that you will have to punch his brother again for being cruel to him. It wasn’t as if he couldn’t do it himself, he could, but because of some reason, he let some things to slide past him._

_˝What happened?˝ You lay down beside him tilting your head to the side observing the side of his face._

_˝Father came back and he wants to go t…˝_

_˝You are not going˝, you said before even thinking about it. He didn’t need your permission, but you didn’t want to lose him._

_˝And who are you to forbid me? You think that I don’t know that mother is forcing you to be with me. You don’t want to marry me, if your parents didn’t say yes to it you would have chosen somebody else.˝_

_Before saying anything you just stared into his eyes with anger. Quickly putting your hand in the water you took it in your palm splashing water on his face. ˝Idiot.˝_

_You were ready to stand up when you felt his fingers around your wrist pushing you back down. He didn’t say anything just looking at you with his mouth slightly opened._

_˝Do you think that I’m an animal that can be sold or given to whoever wants it. Is that what you think of me? Do you think that the girl with whom you have been training and talking would be pressured into something that she doesn’t want?˝_

_˝My mother never asked me, why would your parents do anything different?˝ He let go of your wrist sitting up, turning his back to the water. ˝She said that your parents said yes and that you will be good for me. She is afraid that I will end up alone.˝_

_˝No marriage can make you feel less alone if you don’t want it. Do you want me?˝ Now it was your turn to grab his wrist with your fingers making him turn around._

_˝It doesn’t matter˝_

_˝It does, do you want me or not?˝ You insisted on the answer not wanting to marry somebody who doesn’t want you no matter how much you loved him._

_˝Yes˝, his voice was like a whisper filled with sadness._

_˝Than what is the problem?˝_

_˝You don’t want it˝, he said it if it was the most obvious thing in the world._

_˝How would you know?˝ After he didn’t say anything you smiled. ˝When my parent told me I start to laugh˝ Seeing hurt on his face you quickly continued. ˝I couldn’t believe it, because I never thought that you and I would be anything more. You never seemed if you wanted for me to be anything more. You gave more attention to the girl who was with your brothers than me.  But I still want it; I want you to be mine. Not because my parents said yes to your mother, but because I would say yes if you had asked me, but you never did.˝_

_˝I thought if we don’t talk about it the rejection would hurt less.˝_

_Leaning closer to him you placed your palm on his cheek. ˝I love you.˝ You said before pressing your lips to his. He was surprised by your actions but he didn’t pull away._

_˝I love you˝, he said against your soft lips._

_˝Forever, my love. I promise.˝_

* * *

You waited the whole night passing out for a few minutes and then waited again until you woke up and it was morning. You couldn’t explain it; you didn’t understand why would that man came to your building followed you and then not do anything. At this point, you start thinking that maybe Darcy really was right. There are many weird things happening in the world and it could be that you maybe saw that man in the neighborhood not even noticing and that your brain just took his features for your dreams. Maybe you were a bit paranoid and he could even be living in your building and maybe you were just thinking too much about it. 

* * *

˝Hey, sorry about yesterday˝, you said immediately when you saw Darcy. She was sitting at the table in the restaurant having the papers scattered on it.

˝It’s alright. The cake was good.˝ Darcy looked at you smiling seeing you back at work.

˝I know, I made it.˝

˝Wow, that’s really humble.˝ She laughed before offering you the menu.

˝I learned from the best˝ you took the menu sitting down as you quickly went through it.

˝That’s right.˝

You only giggled at her words still not taking your eyes from the paper.

˝Are the specials alright?˝

˝Yes, but I would remove the last one, it would be too many things to do in one night,˝ you placed the paper down on the table and Darcy picked it up crossing the last special on the paper.

˝Alright, now tell me how are you?˝ Darcy placed the menu and pen on the table focusing completely on you. She tried to call you yesterday multiple times, but you didn’t answer.

˝I don’t know, honestly.˝ Tugging at the sleeve of your gray sweeter you lowered your head.

˝Are you still on the edge?˝ Reaching across the table she took your hand in hers making you look up, but you could only shrug not having the answer to her question.

˝Can’t you see it?˝ You asked after a few moments just wanting to occupy yourself with work or something to stop thinking about that man.

˝Look you are under a lot of stress lately. I know that there is a possibility of what you are saying to be true, but it’s unlikely. It would be unlikely even for me who sometimes goes out, but you are always home. I know you for a long time and I’m aware of how horror movies get to you pretty bad it will probably stop soon you just have to focus on something else.˝

˝And that is the solution?˝

˝I’m not saying to stop being careful, but don’t live in fear. You do it too often.˝

˝I don’t know..˝ Placing your head on the table you murmured the last bit of the sentence ˝I will probably die soon˝

˝You are too dramatic. Everything will be alright. We could talk with your building manager and get you a dog˝

You instantly lifted your head with a smile forming on your face. ˝I want a puppy, but a puppy would need me to protect him and not the other way around.˝

˝You can take a trained dog˝

˝That would be smart, but my building manager is an asshole and he hates me.˝ You crossed your arms feeling defeated even before the talk with him.

˝Just leave it to me, alright?˝

You only nodded smiling like crazy. You wanted a dog since you were little and now there was finally the possibility of getting one and the best thing was that now you were thinking about the puppy and not that man.

˝Now get your ass to the kitchen you will probably be needed there.˝

Walking away you looked over your shoulder confused. ˝When did you become a boss?˝

˝Since you didn’t show a few days ago˝

˝Fair enough˝, you murmured heading to the kitchen.

* * *

The entire restaurant was full tonight with many people still waiting to get sited and that was why you were helping in the kitchen. It was hot and full of overwhelming scents and you were ready to collapse.

˝You should take a break, you didn’t stop for too long.˝ Tom the chef said taking the knife away from you. He was a few years older than you, but kind of an old soul. Everything that he prepared was breathtaking and it would mostly take you back to your childhood, it made you feel warm inside.

˝It’s crowded you need all the help.˝

˝Everyone here had their break, just step away from here for a bit.˝ He insisted and you gave in stepping away. Leaving the kitchen you sat down in the office that was in the back. It was much colder than the kitchen and you felt like you can finally breathe again.  

A few minutes passed by before you heard the knock on the door and Darcy come in. ˝I need you outside.˝

˝I’m in the kitchen today.˝ You said aware that Darcy already knew that information.

˝It’s not that, they are asking to talk with the owner or the person in charge.˝  She said annoyed, Darcy always hated disrespectful people.

˝Who?˝

˝There is some guy asking, I don’t know he didn’t even eat here he just came in asking.˝

You exhaled too tired to deal with those kinds of things. ˝Alright where is he?˝

˝He is next to the bar. Do you want me to come with?˝

˝Yeah˝

* * *

The walk to the bar was short, but somehow it felt like an eternity. You could see the back of the said man mentally preparing yourself to be polite, however something inside you screamed to run away you decided against it.

˝Excuse me˝, you said standing beside the man who immediately turned around in his sit.

˝Oh God˝, stepping backward you bumped into Darcy. Before you could even answer to Darcy’s worried question the man in front of you spoke.

˝I just need to talk to you, please.˝ His voice sounded so familiar, but at the same time as the voice of a stranger. His deep blue eyes were focused on your face pleading you to do as he asked you.

˝No,˝ you backed away.

˝I won’t hurt you.˝ He looked offended seeing you afraid of him.

˝Do you know this man?˝ Darcy stepped in front of you making herself as the barrier between you and the man.

˝Th..That’s him.˝ You were shaking, all the things that you decided earlier that he just lives close went out the window.

Darcy turned towards the man keeping you behind her. ˝Why are you stalking her?˝

˝I just need to talk to her.˝

˝Get out or I will call the cops.˝ Darcy said through her teeth acting as if you were her child that she had to protect.

˝I won’t hurt her.˝

˝You won’t hurt her? You have been stalking her for weeks, you came here where she works, and you even knew that she was in charge here. You broke into her apartment, didn’t you?˝

˝I would ne-˝

˝Get out!˝ Darcy was completely pissed, mostly at herself for not trusting you before.

The man in front of her took the crutches that were leaned against the chair. Standing up he looked away from Darcy to you. As he walked away from the bar he stopped next to you.

˝I know that you feel it too, you’ve seen it.˝

You didn’t dare to look up, but you did look at his back while he was leaving.

You were in shock not even noticing that some people were staring at you and that Darcy was talking to you. Mostly you wanted to follow him to run after him because he was right you were feeling something besides the fear, you were feeling love and trust. But how could you love or trust a man who you have never met before?


	4. Chapter 4

The drops of cold sweat were forming on your forehead while your whole body was overheating covered with a thin blanket. Your room was slightly cold with a fresh breeze that was coming from the open window and still, you were burning. Turning around on your bed you crumpled the covers that were now hanging from your matters. 

Your eyes were closed and your brows were furrowing in your sleep. Your breathing was erratic and you weren’t able to wake up no matter how hard you tried. You were a prisoner inside your own mind and the only way to wake up is for you to die.

* * *

_˝It hurts, it hurts,˝ your voice was low as you stared at your blood covered hands. It didn’t want to stop; the pain or the bleeding._

_˝You can’t leave me˝, the familiar voice said as two strong hands held you close to their chest. One of your hands already has fallen limp beside your body as he kept pressing you closer._

_˝We were promised one life. The Gods wouldn’t break that promise. My love, you have to stay.˝ The warm tears were falling from his face over his chin onto your hair covered with dirt and dried blood.˝_

_˝We…we fought well˝, you could hardly breathe as the blood was dripping from your mouth and your nose. ˝You fought well, my king, my love.˝ You were trying to hold onto him. With your hand that wasn’t wounded as the life was leaving you. You hoped to see your husband’s face before you saw Valkyrie, but there was nobody coming for you._

_˝No, no! Why!?˝_

_You weren’t even supposed to be here, but you were betrayed and taken to your enemies who stabbed you before the battle even began mocking at you and placing you in the middle of the fighting warriors with no shield or sword to protect yourself you knew at the moment when they stabbed you that it was too late for your child._

_˝One life…˝, he whispered holding your limp body. ˝One life and eternity in Valhalla.˝ He kissed the top of your head multiple times still not letting go of you. He didn’t let you not even when his brothers came to take you, he couldn’t let you go. ˝Why would you lie?˝, he silently asked Odin the all mighty father that took you away from him. ˝Why would you take them, I did what you wanted, why would you take them?˝ He was devastated, heartbroken and alone, he lost everything in the matter of a few moments. He lost you and the life you created, but he didn’t know that it was just the beginning of his sorrow. He wasn’t aware of the cruel punishment that the Gods planned for him, for one simple mistake that didn’t bring them any damage they decided to punish him, however, their punishment wouldn’t force them to break their promise. But the great warrior, the leader of the Heathen army was just on the beginning of his sorrow because he would continue to live, and every hundred years you would be born only to die in his arms all over again._

_˝One life, one life and eternity in Valhalla.˝_

* * *

You died five minutes ago in your dream and you still couldn’t calm your breathing. You died, but still, you were alive sitting on the soft mattress in your small room surrounded by white walls. Nothing ever felt so real; nothing has ever shaken you up like that.

And the sorrow in his eyes the almost same amount of sadness as in the restaurant yesterday; he was hurt and betrayed, but not angry. He was never angry only thing that you could see in his eyes or on his face was love and adoration. He was right the previous day you felt it, you feel it. You were never scared of him, but what the idea of him was going to bring into your life. There was the fear not of him, but of the death that follows him, the Grimm reaper that has your name on his list. You feared for your life, you feared for those close around you because the voice in your head that was yours, but still, somebody else’s screamed at you to run. You wanted to live so you decided to do as the voice said to run from the man that you were feeling the connection you have never felt before. You will run from the possibility of him to stay alive. However, you weren’t aware that there is nowhere to run.

He was everywhere. In front of your building when you would leave to go to work, close to the restaurant while you were working, he would even follow you home, but he always kept his distance. After that one incident in the restaurant he never tried to approach you and whenever you were looking at him, you could notice that he was worried. However, after two weeks you had enough, the fear slightly faded as you started feeling more comfortable knowing that he was around which confused you and you wanted that feeling to go away.

* * *

˝Stop it˝, it was the first thing that you told him as you walked across the street from your building.

˝I haven’t done anything˝, he simply said leaning against the wall to move some weight from his upper body.

˝You are following me every day. It’s weird and it’s called stalking!˝ You tried to keep your voice down but you failed at it getting a few looks from the strangers that didn’t bother to ask if you were alright.

˝I’m not stalking you, I’m keeping you safe.˝ He insisted leaning one of the crutches on the wall and showing you with his hand to come closer.

Before you could even process what you were doing you were standing in front of him. ˝I’m capable of defending myself.˝

˝I’m aware of that˝, he reached with his hand towards your face and surprisingly you didn’t flinch. You leaned into his touch as he placed his palm on your cheek.

˝Who are you?˝ You whispered, but he heard you.

˝You really don’t know?˝ You looked up seeing the sadness in his eyes as you nodded. ˝How can you not know? You always remembered.˝

˝What do you mean I always remembered?˝ Moving away from his touch you didn’t break the eye contact waiting for an answer.

˝One life and eternity in Valhalla.˝ He said the words that he was forced to say every time when you were taken from him.

˝Valhalla? That’s a myth, an old legend.˝ You thought that maybe you were some kind weird case of soul mates in which you didn’t even believe, but hearing him mentioning Valhalla you started thinking that he was really crazy.

˝You all let go of the gods as the time changed, but I still hold onto them because of their punishment I lost my wife and my child too many times to count.˝

You already stepped away from him not understanding what he was saying. ˝Did you just confessed that you killed someone?˝

˝No, I-˝ He reached out to you, but you backed away.

˝Stay away from me!˝

˝I won’t hurt you, why can’t you believe me?! Why is it different this time?!˝

Your hand shook as you walked backward watching his every move not carrying about the cars that were driving on the street. ˝I’m…I’m going to report you. Stay away or you will go to jail.˝ You hurried across the street and ran to the restaurant. You decided to go to the police station after work before you go home, however you weren’t aware that he couldn’t let you do that. He couldn’t let anyone even you to take you away from him.

* * *

˝I’m being stalked˝, that were the first words you spoke to the police officer who asked if he can help you. Soon after that, you were escorted to the small room where another man came in. he was also dressed in the police uniform and after he introduced himself he sat in front of you.

˝For how long?˝

˝I’m not sure, more than a few weeks˝, now that you were actually in the police station you felt guilty for to you unknown reason.

˝Do you know who is stalking you?˝ The man said moving his fingers over the short dark beard.

˝I don’t know.˝

˝Can you describe them?˝

You nodded and then started talking. ˝A man, I would say in the early 20s, he had dark hair and….,˝ you stop for a moment not knowing if you should realy do this, but after the police officer cleared his throat you continued. ˝… and he had crutches.˝

˝Crutches?˝ The man asked furrowing his thick brows and you nodded. ˝As in his leg was broken or?˝

˝I don’t know˝

˝Miss are you sure that you are not being stalked by your ex-boyfriend?˝ He asked annoyed, because of your lack of answers as if you were trying to hide some information.

˝No, you don’t believe me?˝

˝You said that you were stalked by a man that uses crutches and has dark hair that is not a lot of informations, it seems like you don’t want to even be here.˝ He shrugged leaning his body into the chair.

˝I don’t know him, he came to the place where I work, my friend asked him to leave. He follows me every day from work and to work I can’t take it anymore˝

˝You can file a complaint, and then we will work from there.˝

˝A complaint, against whom when I don’t even know who he is?!˝ You were on your feet screaming at him tired of being looked down. He treated you as if you came here to get attention and not actually to get help and to feel safe.

˝Miss if you don’t calm down I will have to ask you to leave.˝

˝When you find me dead, the thought that you could have helped me will hunt you. And he will do it, he has done it before.˝ You were on the verge of crying but you didn’t want to show that asshole that you were vulnerable. You walked out of the door and you didn’t stop when you heard him call out your name. You kept walking knowing that nobody could help you and you were right because when you fall asleep that night you never woke up in your home in the morning


	5. Chapter 5

_No, no, no_

You didn’t have to open your eyes to know that something was wrong. The mattress, the sheets, the lack of your new dog next to you was the confirmation for you that you weren’t in your home. Not only that but also the feeling of somebody watching you. You knew who it was, you knew, but you couldn’t figure out what was wrong with him. 

During all this time that he appeared, you had mixed feelings about him and what he was bringing with him. Firstly there was fear, but not for him, then some strange feeling of wanting his presence close to you, but after the confrontation outside your building one thing resurfaced but this time you were afraid of him.

˝I know that you are awake˝

You heard a low voice knowing exactly to whom it belonged, but still hoping it was a part of a dream.

˝I’m not surprised that my stalker knows that˝, you opened your eyes slowly only for them to stop at the man who sat in the chair close to the bed and with that close to you.

˝I’m trying to keep you safe˝ You could notice the sincerity in his tone, however in this kind of situation you were too busy in thinking about how to escape than think about it.

˝No! You are trying to keep me close to yourself, you are selfish and sick˝ You sat up on the bad screaming at him. You were in some kind of bedroom it was actually nice the walls were light blue with pictures of the landscape, but knowing that you were in somebody else’s bed only bad things were coming to your mind.

˝If it makes you feel better, think like that, but you know the truth deep down.˝ He sat straighter in the chair with his hands in his lap. He seemed slightly nervous with tugging at his fingers and his head was held low.

˝And what is the truth that we will go to Valhalla? Valhalla doesn’t exist it’s a part of the legend just like the Norse gods.˝ You noticed the moment how he lifted his head immediately when you mentioned Valhalla. ˝Do you know how many movies and shows they made about them?˝ You moved your hands to pull the sheet closer to your chest. You were still in your sleeping shorts and oversized shirt and you felt exposed although, in your dreams he had already seen everything, he even touched you in them.

˝I don’t watch TV.˝ He simply said still sitting slightly uncomfortable.

˝Of course you don’t, you watch me instead. Such a lovely hobby.˝ Rolling your eyes you tilted your head to the side and then something caught your eye.

˝I know that you are having a hard time believing me, but ask me anything and I will tell you the truth.˝

˝What’s your name?˝ You asked not even looking at him, but staring at the night table where a black and white photo was placed beside an antique looking necklace.

˝Ivar˝ His voice made you look back at him feeling too strange by staring at the photo with your face on it, however, it clearly wasn’t you on it.

˝Yeah right˝ You scoffed not believing that he had Nordic name, it was too weird altogether.

He only nodded still not meeting your eyes but looking at you.

˝Great it’s not crazy enough that I have a stalker, but he has a weird name too˝

˝Do you want to know your name?˝ He asked genuinely curious, he tried to keep calm although it killed him that you were so close to him, but scared and not safe in his arms.

˝I know my name thank you very much,˝ you silently said.

˝I mean your real name.˝ He was trying so hard to let you trust him to show you that he wasn’t a threat. Maybe he took a wrong approach with you, he never had to do something before because you would always remember and now you don’t. It killed him.

˝You mean a name that you gave me in your little fantasy?˝ You moved closer to the edge of the bed still holding the sheet close to you.

˝It’s not a fantasy,˝ he was quick to respond.

It was the first time that you actually felt bitterns in his voice, but mostly hurt and it annoyed you because you were sure that he thought that everything he said was truth. You didn’t know how to talk to a delusional person; you didn’t know what to do except panic and try to defend yourself with sarcasm that only hurt him even more.

˝Than what is it?˝ You tried to tune down your contempt or maybe fear and try to sound as you usually do. Because honestly you didn’t want to hurt him, at least one part of you, but the part of your self-preservation was screaming at you to run however it was once again muffled by your voice that didn’t belong you.

˝Those dreams that you are having, don’t even try to lie to me I know that you recognized me from there. That is my past and yours˝

You couldn’t stop yourself from scoffing at his words, but he seemed like he didn’t hear it, but you were wrong.

˝Will you give me a chance to explain?˝ His eyes met yours for the first time and only thing that you could do under his piercing gaze was to nod.

˝We have grown up together hundreds of years ago. You were my best and only friend, you were the only person that accepted me and loved me for whom I was.˝ Ivar stopped for a moment trying to collect himself not wanting to seem even more vulnerable than he was. ˝We got married and you fought beside me. Everything was as it was supposed to be, but the Gods seek punishment for me so,˝ the words caught up in his throat and he took a deep breath to continue, but it didn’t stop his voice from cracking, ˝they killed you and our unborn child. You died in my arms, you bleed out. Years past by and I stayed the same. People around me died from sickness by a sword of old age, but I stayed alive and same. So many years passed by and then I saw you.˝ For the first time, you heard happiness and enthusiasm in his voice although barely noticeable it was there even in his eyes and a small smile that formed on his face. ˝You were beautiful as I remembered and you remembered me. You still loved me but your name was different your parents were different only we were the same. We got married again, but you never came back to our shared home,˝ by now his voice was back to sadness and you could even notice how his hands were clenching into the fists. He was mad and angry, but you could only guess on whom. ˝You were killed a few hours after the ceremony. I watched you die again in my arms. And then it would happen again and again and again. Every time you would be taken away from me, but not this time. I won’t let anything to hurt you; you will stay by my side.˝

˝I would rather kill myself than spend the rest of my life with you.˝ The words left your mouth before you had time to stop them, but it didn’t surprise you. You were always quick to respond in the way that would let people know that you weren’t joking; you never wanted to lead on anyone.

˝You have already done that the last time, maybe that is why you don’t remember me anymore˝

˝I killed myself?˝ At the moment you heard his words you could feel it, the sting on your skin. It hurt from your wrist a line all the way up to the inside of your elbow.

˝I was sure that that time we will grow old together it was the longest I had you since you died the first time. We were married and expecting our first child, first child that we thought will finally be born. It was born, but it was stillborn. You couldn’t take it anymore, all the loss. I found you in the bathtub with your wrists cut open you were still breathing, I never felt such a pain before and I will never forget what you whispered˝ He looked away whipping tears from his eyes.

˝What did I say?˝

˝You did this to us,˝ his voice was a like a whisper and it came out so smoothly that it made you believe he said that to himself every day like a prayer.

˝I didn-˝ It confused you the answer, you couldn’t understand how somebody could be guilty of that.

˝You said to me that and you were right. I did it; we are cursed because of me. We will never grow old together because of me, I can’t lose you, but you are always taken from me.˝

˝How can you believe in any of that?˝ The voice of reason finally spoke for you.

˝It’s the truth.˝ He said defending himself with his hands under his chin as he leaned his elbows on his knees.

˝The truth is that you kidnapped me, which I still don’t get it how, and I’m hoping you didn’t hurt my dog.˝

˝He is not harmed; he is in the other room. And as you noticed, my legs, I had to pay someone to take you; I made sure that nobody touches you.˝ He would never let anybody hurt you, but failing so many times it scared him to put your life in somebody else’s hands. It was the risk that he had to take to keep you safe.

˝What’s with your legs are they broken?˝ You didn’t really even thought about it thinking his leg must be broken or something, honestly you didn’t give it a second glance.

˝No, I was born like this. In the time when I was growing up there wasn’t really a name for it and it was looked as if I’m useless. My own father left me outside to die; nobody has accepted me until you.˝

Your heart broke a little for him with the mention of his own father leaving him to die. But a small smile found its way on your face hearing that at least he had someone even if he thought that it was you.

˝You even helped me to accept myself and if it wasn’t for you I would never became the man I was supposed to be. However, now that man means nothing, he is dead a part of the history where he should rest, but still I’m here.˝

When he mentioned history you finally connected a few dots. The first dream that you had and others that followed but around that age you realize they were in Viking era. And if his name was Ivar you could only remember Ivar as a son of Ragnar from your history class. ˝Do you know how crazy that sounds?˝

˝I don’t know because this never happened before˝

˝But why do you do it?˝ Your feet were hanging from the bed as you tilted your head to see his face.  No matter how many times you saw his face you always notice something new. A small detail and as you stared at him longer you actually realized how many details you could have say to the police officer, but somehow you only said basics and nothing more.

˝Search for you?˝ His voice broke you from your thoughts and you quickly responded.

˝No, why do you wait? You can find somebody else or you can end it.˝

˝I tried˝

˝So did they die or?˝ You weren’t even aware of how close you actually came to him, like something was pushing you closer.

˝I never tried to be with somebody else knowing that you are out there, but I tried to end it multiple times once even with you.˝

˝What happened?˝ When he stopped you reached with your hand towards his reassuring him to continue.

˝I tried to kill myself, but I never died. I always woke up. Once we decided to do it together. We took poison at the same time and only you died. Every time only you and sometimes or child with you.˝

˝I felt it,˝ you squeezed his hand and he tightened his grip waiting for you to continue. ˝The loss of a baby when I woke up, I missed you and I missed them.˝

˝So could we try?˝

˝Ivar, I did miss you, but I don’t know you.˝ You moved your hand from his grip s if it burnt you after you realized what you did. You felt for him, everything that he said was heartbreaking, however it wasn’t the reality and it wouldn’t be healthy for you to feed his delusion. ˝You stalked me; you kidnapped me that is not a beginning of a love story.˝

˝We both now that is not a beginning, this life should be our end, together at the old age.˝

˝I’m sorry, but I wish that I could trust you, but I can’t.˝ You moved your whole body further on the bed bringing your knees to your chest.

˝You need time and I can give that to you. Time is all I have, I will wait. ˝ He smiled sadly taking his crutches and you stayed silent. He also hasn’t say anything else walking to the door. Before they close after him you could see your dog Spike who was Akita running to you. And it made you think that maybe, but just maybe he wasn’t that bad of a man after all.

 

There is a saying that time heals all wounds, but not for him. To him, time is cutting them deeper and deeper not letting them to heal not letting him forget not even letting him to end his suffering. The time is not a healer to him it is a curse, every minute without you, every minute while you are dying in his arms, it’s a curse. Cursed by the Gods that will never let him go.


	6. Chapter 6

For a moment you thought that he won’t hurt you that he actually loves you and like everything, that moment also ended. He could be a good man, but he also could be a bad man and kidnapping you showed that he was on the wrong side of the law, therefore, a criminal. He chose to take you against your will, he chose to stalk you and even you didn’t know why your dog didn’t attack him. 

During times like this, there is little that common sense can actually do until the panic shut it down completely. Everything that you thought until this moment with trying to place him in your life as a soul mate or something that never happens or a just simple case of stalking was gone. All that you could think about was him killing you or doing something that to you would be even worse. You couldn’t compose yourself as you were drastically falling apart. Your fingers were gripping tightly onto covers as Spike was sitting next to you on the bed pushing the side of your face with his muzzle. He was trying to comfort you, but you could only stare blankly ahead. You were panicking like never before with tears already falling from your eyes and small whimpers leaving your mouth. Your body was shaking and your mind couldn’t get out of the dark place it went in. You feared you will never leave this room or ever see those close to you. There was some sort of assurance to you that police was probably looking for you but then again it’s not like anybody would notice you missing except Darcy who would probably notice after work when checking on you because you didn’t come to work. So approximately there was no chance that anybody would even find you at least until tomorrow which meat that you had to stay in this bedroom with a man for whom you had the most mixed feelings you ever had. You didn’t even know if when police find you that you would want for Ivar to be locked away. You didn’t know why you would feel that way for a man who kidnapped you, as you were trying not to let yourself be delusional with those dreams.

Being so deep in your mind you didn’t notice two strong hands pulling you closer to them. You only acknowledged that somebody was touching you as you heard his voice and instead of pushing him away, you moved closer to his chest. Spike already left you lying on the edge of the bed while Ivar was pulling you closer.

“Don’t cry, we were promised one life and we will have it,” Ivar spoke softly against the top of your head before kissing your hair. Surprisingly to him, you didn’t pull away from him but you gripped his shirt between your fingers holding onto him as he was the only thing keeping your head above the water.

˝This time will be the right one. This time we will grow old together as it was promised. You and me, love.” Ivar spoke with his voice breaking at the end. His arms held you so tight that nobody would be able to tear you two apart and that was what he was scared of.

“I know that I said it before, I know and I am sorry for everything. I am sorry for our loss and for your pain.” As you didn’t say anything onto that and your breathing significantly calmed down he kept talking while occasionally hearing you sniffling.

“I just feel that this time it will be different; since I saw you it was different. After you told me you didn’t remember, I just…I thought that maybe that was the reason, but no. This time is our chance, the Gods are testing our love and they will be merciful. They will grant us a long life.”

“They won’t,” you said silently. It wasn’t something that you were intending to say or even thinking about it just slipped your mouth as if they no longer were yours.

The grip on you loosened and Ivar brought his hand to below your chin to lift it so that he could see you. Looking at you smile formed on his face but when the words you spoke came back to him he could only stare confused at you. Earlier you were telling him that he was delusional and now there was at least hope that you were thinking about you and him and it warmed his heart as well as it brought pain to him knowing you didn’t believe that this life will be yours.

“I know that w-”

“The first time I dreamt about you it was Vikings period and if I remember correctly they were known during the 8th century and we are now in 21st. What could possibly make you think that this time will be different as you said it, I will die and if everything you are saying is a lie then you are just crazy and you will kill me, but either way, I will die.” You spoke for the first time realizing that there was no way out. In your eyes there was no third option it was only dying somehow or by his hand.

“No,” he sternly said while keeping his eyes on yours. He could see the fear in them but for the first time when present, it wasn’t completely because of him.

“No? Ivar you kidnapped me, you took me away from my friend and not even once did you actually ask me if I want you.”

Ivar suddenly looked away not able to keep himself from crying as a tear fell from his eyes. “I’ve been waiting, I’ve been loyal and never even thought about anybody else and you are saying that you don’t want me?” he questioned while his hands completely let go of you.

“How can you expect from me to want you as I don’t know you?” you asked with heaviness settling upon your heart.

“No, you are right, I almost forgot that nobody ever wants to be close to little crazy Ivar, right? You are regretting this, I know. You said it yourself, I did this; I am the one keeping you from reuniting with your family. I am the one who should die…” his voice completely broke and his chest was rising and falling fast as he couldn’t calm down. He was losing himself as for years he was trying to stay calm, he was trying to not lose hope and he was wishing for you to never leave his side. And nothing could hurt as much as the woman he loved telling him that she doesn’t want him.

“I am the one guilty here and you were pulled in this chaos with me, because of me. If you had said no to me, if you had never stayed by my side you would be free. You would have your life and now you can’t even fucking get old!” his voice was louder than before making you pull away more from him. Spike came closer lying against your legs while you kept your hands around yourself feeling empty after he let go of you.

“Ivar…I…” you stopped not knowing what to say. It didn’t help at the moment if you believed him or if you saw him as crazy, but you didn’t know what to say or what to do. You could only feel your heart breaking looking him like that.

“Go,” his voice was like a whisper as he forced himself to say those words.

“What?” you asked not sure if you heard him correctly.

“There are clothes for you in the bag in the hallway, take your dog and go,” Ivar said while staring at the picture next to the bed. He had to ask himself it was time to let go; if it was time to be again miserable as he was without you, but this time mostly because of his own decision.

“Ivar, wha-”

“Leave!” he yelled making you flinch at his harshness.

You were frozen in place and didn’t know if he was serious or was just playing with you, but as he yelled again at you afterward you quickly left the room with Spike, leaving Ivar alone to cry on his own without anyone willing to hold him in his sorrow.

* * *

_Something was wrong this morning; for the first time in years you woke up alone. Ivar was never the one to leave you in a cold bed and you were broken he did it as if you couldn’t comfort him. Since his parents died he was pushing you away, he even told you to leave, he yelled at you and almost threw you out of your shared home, but you stood your ground. You knew him better than anybody else, you knew your husband and you know that he needed somebody to hold him, but was too scared in losing them too. Just as you knew where he often goes, so after getting dressed and quickly fixing your hair you headed to the hill that was overlooking Kattegat._

_As you got closer you could already hear him crying. His back was to you and he was staring ahead at nature before him. You didn’t say anything as you approached him, but your steps could be heard loud enough to warn him about your presence. However, he didn’t do anything, not even glancing to you to actually confirm who was there. You didn’t question his lack of movement as you knew that he was broken so you carefully sat down next to him before putting your hands around him. Ivar was quick to move closer to you and to press his head against your chest while still sobbing. You were the only person who had seen him like this and you were well aware that you were the only one allowed to do so._

_“They are gone…” he whispered against your body still not looking at you but pressing even closer to you._

_“They are in a better place, you shouldn’t mourn Ivar, in a few decades we will sit with them,” you assured him as you knew that he was destined to be a great king and to lead his people to victory._

_“You will leave too,” Ivar said silently, but you heard it._

_“Look at me,” you said after loosening the grip on him. You could see that he was reluctant; however, he did lift his head to look at you as you requested._

_“I love you, I will fight beside you and I will die for you,” you said while holding your palms gently against his face._

_Ivar was about to look down as he couldn’t make himself believe it, everybody always leaves. However, you knew him to well so your finger moved to under his chin keeping his head in the same level with yours._

_“I know that you doubt me, and it breaks my heart, but I will never leave you Ivar. I will forever stay by your side in life and in death, I promise you.” After saying those words you leaned closer to him, pressing your forehead with his and with your noses touching lightly._

_“I love you,” Ivar said after a few moments of silence and you didn’t waste any time before saying it back._

_“I will make you proud, I will make myself worthy of your love,” he assured you before softly pressing his lips against yours._

_He never truly doubted you, he doubted himself and he was sure that one day he will do something that will make you walk away. However, that day didn’t have time to come as you were taken away from him just like your baby. You never had a chance to make your own decision to leave him and it broke him even more as you were loyal to him until your dying breath and even after._


	7. Chapter 7

_Years have gone by and he stayed alone, everyone around him was dying and he stayed the same. He couldn’t understand why the Gods would curse him. He couldn’t understand what he had done wrong for everyone to be taken away from him. He had nothing except the hole in his chest, he had no mercy either. He was just a shadow of a man he used to be. He no longer cared for anyone; he would never have doubts about doing anything as it seemed the death was running away from him. He killed, he tortured, not because he enjoyed it, he wanted to feel something; anything except the emptiness inside him.  
_

_Ivar was sitting at the shore where you and he spent most of your time. He just needed to be close to you and the place made your memory more vivid, it made him smile for a fracture of second before he is reminded again that you weren’t coming back, but he did. Every day he would sit in the same place for a while. He had nowhere to be, except still mourning the loss of the woman he loved and the child he had never got the chance to hold._

_The soft breeze was carrying the drops of salty water making them touch his face. It was refreshing, but to him, it was nothing more than a weak distraction. He was sitting in silence as long ago he stopped begging Gods for mercy.  Long ago he had lost all the hope he had, then when he had lost his heart._

_“Ivar,” the voice was heard behind him, but he didn’t turn around._

_The voice was so silent that he was sure he was imagining it, he was sure that the sounds of waves crashing into the shore were playing tricks with him. However, when he heard it again he couldn’t ignore it._

_Air got caught in his throat and for a moment he stopped breathing. His eyes were tearing up and he couldn’t move stunned with what was before him. He couldn’t believe that you were standing a few feet away from him. To him, you looked beautiful as always, as his beautiful warrior._

_Your feet were bare and bloody just as the thin dress you were wearing. The skin which was visible was full of cuts and your hand was still gripping the dagger while the drops of blood were sliding from it._

_He didn’t know what to do; he didn’t react until your body hit the ground. Ivar was quick to reach you pulling your body to his. He was holding your head close to his chest pulling you closer. His fingers moved slowly over your face smearing the blood on it while your tired eyes were staring at him._

_“How…how are you here, love? Have I finally died?” he asked somehow hopefully._

_“I had to find you,” you said silently. Your lips were dried and covered in thin cuts while your body was shaking from coldness._

_Ivar pulled your legs closer as he tried to put his furs around your body. He couldn’t find any explanation in why would you be there or why would you be covered in blood. “Why would you need to find me? Where were you?”_

_“Valhalla, I wasn’t let in,” you admitted gripping onto his shirt whit your almost numb fingers._

_“No, you…you are a fallen warrior…”_

_“I was born again, I had to find you,” you spoke the best you could as you were losing your words. You spent almost your whole life searching for him. You remembered him, you remembered everything and you were ready to kill to be with him again just as you did._

_“You found me, love,” his hands gripped you tighter as he couldn’t believe you were there. He was holding you so close that no man or even God could tear you apart._

_“Tell me you love me,” you whispered._

_“You know that I do, I’ve never stopped.”_

_“I need to hear you; I’ve been waiting for years,” you told him looking up at him._

_“I love you and I will never let you go again,” he spoke as his fingers moved over your chin._

_He had you back in his life and he thought that maybe Gods had mercy on him, but it didn’t take long before he was proven wrong as you were again taken away.  
_

_______________________________________________________________  
_

You couldn’t understand it; it wasn’t something that could be explained. All of those feelings you had for him and the dreams in which he was the main character confused you but made you think that it could be real. Your life wasn’t the most exciting or something that was filling your heart, but having him in your life filled the hole in your chest which you haven’t noticed before. He changed something in you, not because he just came into your life but because he came back into it, he was the missing piece. He was the piece you never thought was lost.

And as you were standing behind the doors listening to his cries you couldn’t leave. You just couldn’t leave him behind, it couldn’t be explained but he had a hold on you. He was a part of you and you need for him to know that. He couldn’t be just a crazy person, he wouldn’t appear in your dreams if he was, but then again you knew that you had to be careful. Still, you didn’t decide to leave or to try to contact anyone as the phone was a few steps away from you. What you did surprised you as much as it surprised him.

You walked back in the room making your way towards the bed where you sat next to him sneaking your hands around him.

“You are free to go,” he said not returning the gesture. He was ready to move away from you as he sniffled but you locked your arms around him making it more difficult for him, however, if he really wanted to move away he could easily overpower you.

“I was the whole time, wasn’t I?” you questioned as he mentioned nothing about a key for you to get out.

Ivar nodded his head making his tears soak into your shirt as his head was now against your chest. “Doors are unlocked,” he confirmed out loud as you previously stayed silent.

“But I can’t leave,” you whispered telling him something that was clouding your mind.

“We are not far from your home.”

“No, Ivar I can’t… I don’t understand it but I can’t leave you,” you admitted loosening your grip on him so he could look at your face.

His brows were furrowed in confusion as he couldn’t understand what you were saying. “But you said t-”

“Ivar I know what I said, I’m so confused,” you said interrupting him. Your fingers moved higher on his body to his jaw where you slowly traced the line to his chin.

“Ask me anything and I will answer you,” Ivar offered as his hand came in contact with yours. He led your hand to his cheek laying it against his skin while his other settled on your cheek.

“Who are you really to me? I don’t need stories just plain information.”

“We have grown up together; we got married young before you joined me to avenge my father, you were my queen and you were pregnant when the enemy captured you. They killed you; you died in my arms,” he said quickly not wanting to think about those memories for too long.

“What happened then?” you asked lowering your hand to his neck where it stayed as you stared into his eyes while listening to every word he said.

“I was mourning and I never stopped, years went by, everyone was growing older and I stayed the same. I watched my brothers die; I watched their children die and theirs after. ”

“How do we find each other? Do I find you or do you find me?”

“The first time, you found me. I thought the Gods were playing tricks with me.” The memory was still fresh in his mind as he cherished it; it was the day when his hope was restored; it was the day when his love came back.

“But they weren’t.”

“No,” his hands fell back to his legs as he lowered his head. He was ashamed as couldn’t save you again although he was given a second chance. He failed every single time and it broke him.

“And then I died again,” you said moving your thumb to his cheek to wipe away the tear on it.

“Yes, many times you were taken away.”

“Aren’t you bored of it, aren’t you done?” you asked lifting his chin to look at him.

He was reluctant to lift his gaze, but when he did on your face was nothing that he expected. He could finally see that you were asking because you cared. .“I’m tired of seeing you die, but every minute I get to spend with you is a gift”

“But it’s not a gift, is a curse?” you corrected him.

“It’s both,” his lips curved into a weak smile as it came as both blessing and a curse, but over the years he learned to appreciate the blessing.

“And if we had died together the first time what then?”

“We would be in Valhalla now,” his lips finally curved more as he talked. There was even a trace of hope and excitement in it.

“What is Valhalla to you?” you asked curiously not knowing what people who really believed in it expected to find there.

“It’s a place where I would see my family again, all of them who had fallen and you would be by my side just as when we were ruling Kattegat.”

“Was I a good queen?” you asked with a smile finally finding its way to your face. It was also nice to see a smile on his.

“You were; people loved you, not just because you knew when to show mercy, but it was because you were fearless and bloodthirsty. You were a true Viking.”

“And you?” the moment you asked that you noticed as the redness appeared on his cheeks.

He looked away a bit not knowing what to say really as you were always the one who would tell him the answer on what you were asking him now. “I…I was by your side.”

“Don’t be like that,” you said slightly punching his shoulder and making him laugh.

“Like what?”

“Tell me who you really are, if you were a king then you were brave and smart and loyal. Were you all those things?” you asked narrowing your brows and having a serious look on your face as you were daring him to say something wrong.

“I always doubted that, but you were always there to remind me.”

“And now I’m here again,” you said not even realizing that you were crying until he wiped your tears.

He was closer to you than before, merely inches away and you didn’t move away. “I hope so,” he whispered against your lips before closing the space between you.


	8. Chapter 8

_You were slowly walking into the home you shared with your husband as you were still under the influence of the news you received. It was good news, those which bring joy to other people and which should make you feel so happy. They did make you happy, but also scared, only slightly._

_Your home was warm inside as the fire was crackling in the corner of the room. You noticed Ivar’s form immediately he was sitting on the furs next to the fire. His hands were busy with a piece of wood he was carving into a wolf. You didn’t know why, but you guessed that he also noticed what you did a week ago._

_“Ivar,” you asked placing your hand on his shoulder.  
_

_Ivar looked up immediately placing his hand over yours. He brought your hand to his lips kissing your knuckles before asking you to join him on the ground. “Are you alright? Hvitserk told me that he saw you leaving early in the morning,” he thought of one place where you could go, but he thought that if his suspicions were true that you would maybe ask him to go with you._

_“Yes, I went to see a healer,” you answered keeping your voice low, it was almost so silent that fire could overpower it._

_“Come here,” he said after placing the knife next to the piece of wood. He moved your legs over his so that you would be close to him. “Are you alright, love?”_

_“I’m alright,” you answered still avoiding the eye contact._

_“Tell me what is wrong,” he pleaded as his fingers moved to your chin so that you would finally look at him._

_“There is nothing wrong, it’s just…” you moved your head to the side losing the contact of his fingers._

_“What did healer say?”_

_“She told me that I was healthy and that…” you let the words fade from your lips as you didn’t want him to think that you were regretting anything after you finally tell him._

_“What? You are scaring me,” he admitted as his fingers again moved to your face. He was pleading with his eyes for you to tell him what was wrong._

_“I’m pregnant,” you whispered under your breath._

_“You are pregnant? You are pregnant with my baby?!” his lips were curved into a big smile and his fingers stayed on the side of your face gently rubbing your skin._

_“No, it’s Hvitserk’s,” you said slightly offended as it wasn’t possible for anybody than Ivar to be a father._

_“What?” his smile disappeared in the second he heard your words. His nose scrunched and a little wrinkle settled between his eyebrows as he observed your face not understanding why did you say that._

_“Of course it’s yours, you idiot!”_

_“I know it’s mine,” he told you sure of it. You were actually the only person to who he trusted without a question. He knew that you would never betray him, but that didn’t mean that you would never tease or mess with him._

_“Oh, now you know?  Well, it must be nice to know everything,” you said dramatically and letting your upper body to meet the rest of the fur._

_“And I also know that just as I, you are scared,” he told you looking down at you and you hid your face behind your hands._

_“I’m not scared of what you think,” you murmured and Ivar moved to lie beside you with one of his hands he moved yours from your face._

_“Yes, you are.”_

_“I would love them the same i-”_

_“If they end up like me, I know, but it would break your heart if they end up alone,” he spoke the same thing you wanted to say._

_“I just…”_

_“Our baby no matter the way they are born, they will have something I never had when I was a kid,” he assured you as he knew you. He knew that for something like that you needed for him to tell you that everything was going to be alright._

_“And what is that?”_

_“It will have a mother full of love and support who will teach him our ways and will make it the best warrior that the world had ever seen,” he said moving his fingers to your cheek before placing a soft kiss against your lips._

_“And what about its father?” you asked with his lips inches away from you. You could feel his warm breath against your skin._

_“What about the father? He will sleep all day and be an angry old man,” Ivar joked kissing you on the nose before you pushed him away. Your hands stayed on his shoulders as you stared at him._

_“Really?”_

_“Yeah,” he shrugged already leaning in for another kiss, but you didn’t let him come closer._

_“So, he won’t be full of understanding and love his baby more than his own life, won’t he be the one teaching his baby about war and the Gods, won’t he be there next to his wife watching his children grow up?”_

_“Children?” he asked surprised._

_“Yes,” you answered letting him come closer._

_“How many?” he asked against your lips before biting into your lower lip as he knew how you loved that._

_“The whole little army,” you answered while running your fingers through his hair._

_“You know that I will be there, right?” he asked completely serious with your noses touching._

_“I know.”_

_“I will be there for every step they make, for every word they say.”_

_“I love you, Ivar,” you said quietly and although you have said it so many times in your life it still had a strong meaning to the both of you, it was never just empty words._

_“I love you and our little warrior,” he said before kissing you as his hand was placed on your lower abdomen.  
_

_______________________________________________________________  
_

You were turning in your sleep; your body was slightly shaking and was covered with a thin layer of sweat. The room was suddenly too hot for your body as your dream kept your mind occupied. It wasn’t just what you were seeing, but how again you were losing that feeling of actually being happy with him and expecting a child.

“No, no, no,” you were murmuring in your sleep accidentally waking up Ivar. It has been more than a week since you decided to stay and you even called Darcy and told her that you had to leave town just to sort yourself. Ivar and you were getting closer and it wasn’t the first time for him to sleep next to you, but you still kept each to their side and Ivar was more than respectful.

“You are alright, look at me, it was just a dream,” Ivar said after your eyes finally fluttered open.

He was holding your face in his hands as he looked at you. He noticed dried tears on your skin and sadness in your eyes.

“But it wasn’t,” your voice came out broken as you were trying not to cry. It was getting harder for you to sleep as the memories were coming back to you more than ever.

“What did you see?”

“The first time I told you I was pregnant,” you told him closing your eyes as you didn’t want to see the disappointment on his face.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered.

Your eyes were quick to open as you looked at him, not understanding how it could be his fault. He hasn’t done this, anything bad actually that happened. “It’s not your fault.”

“But it is, I should’ve had protected you, both of you,” he said retreating his hands from you and you stopped him intertwining your fingers with one of his hands.

“You are only a man Ivar.”

“I’m a man who failed you,” he said in anger. He was heartbroken and it was tearing you apart as everything bad that happened he carried as his own burden and it wasn’t his.

Ivar was ready to give you space as he moved to leave the bed. He thought that it would be easier for you to not look at him right now, he even started regretting on approaching you this time as he should have let you find someone else. He shouldn’t have been selfish as he always was.

“Please don’t go,” you said tugging onto his arm and pulling him back to the previous position.

“Do you really want me here?” he asked as you both were laying on your sides facing each other. “If you leave you could have a chance to fell in love and to grow old with someone.”

“I am already in love,” you said under your breath moving closer to him.

“No, you don’t mean that,” he tried to move your hand away which settled against his cheek but you didn’t let him.

“I do, I love you.”

“How can you be sure?”

“I would have left if I had no love for you,” you told him with your lips curving into a smile because you really did love him no matter how hard at the start you didn’t want to believe him.

“But do you really want to stay?” his voice was shaky as he hoped for a positive answer.

“I belong with you, in life and in death,” you said against his lips as your noses touched.

“I love you.”


	9. Chapter 9

_There were no answers; for years you have been looking, searching and even after you die you start again. It was tiring, it was painful and it was a desperate woman’s way of trying to save the man she loves from another tragedy. It wasn’t as it wasn’t painful to die, but it was harder to leave someone behind again and again._

_You could never be able to understand how much Ivar had and will suffer. He was punished, but no punishment should last as long as his has. His punishment should have ended hundreds of years ago, but no, he is still paying the price. He is paying the price with his wife’s and child’s lives again and again with the ending nowhere near.  
You searched for the answers for him, to stop his misery, to help him get what he needed what he craved for. So many times when he was completely opened with you he told you that he craved for an ending, he craved for something he could never get; death. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to be with you it was that for years he was alone to only be with you for a few months and then again alone. Those lonely years tortured him and sometimes those spent with you were even worse as he never knew when will you be taken again, so he craved for something definitive, for something that would end it all, for peace for his tortured soul. _

_Chills run through your body as the cold breeze crept inside through the open window. You couldn’t sleep as for days you had been ill. Your chest hurt and your cough only got worse and you knew that you were close to being taken away so you kept it away from Ivar, especially after noticing blood when you would cough. You knew if you say something that Ivar would cling onto you even more, but you needed time alone to find the answer not wanting for him to know that you were still searching. Many times after you died you wouldn’t remember everything and mostly it would be considering what you were searching for so you would have to do everything again from the start.  
Your fingers moved over the harsh surface of the paper as you were reading. The stale smell tickled your nostrils already making you sneeze two times. The book in your hands wasn’t just a book it was a diary, your diary which besides Ivar was primary to you to find after you are born again. There were written all the small things which could bring you closer to the end. But there was also something every time, there was the feeling of fear as you would turn over the pages not sure if you want to know. You were reluctant in reading the words which would give you the answer as that would most likely finish with you never seeing Ivar again and that scared you. _

_Your eyes almost popped out of their sockets as you began reading another paragraph: “I found it, three days ago, I found the answer. I don’t know what to do. I have been searching for so long and now when I know I can’t go through with it. I can’t do what is needed to be done. Maybe I should keep dying. It’s safer to die than anything else. I can’t do it, I can’t…” as you read the ending of the sentence your heart stopped. The sudden dread overcame your body and you stared at the words reading them again and again. You couldn’t understand the beginning of the paragraph but reading the ending, knowing the answer you could understand it. And just as in the past life you weren’t sure if you were ready to try, although you spent years searching._

______________________________________________________________

It had been weeks since you had decided to stay with Ivar. It had been weeks since you started believing him and were questioning your sanity. Also, it had been weeks since the dreams got more frequent and more intense just like the one from which you were woken up today.   
However, today’s dream opened your eyes and today’s dream made you think about something you never thought you will. And as you were trying to decide it seemed as your body had already made a decision as it moved towards the doors opening them for Spike to leave. It was as if your mind shut down, but was still present and wanted to do what was about to happen however it was still partially against it. So after letting your dog leave your fingers gripped the handle of the largest kitchen knife before pulling it out.   
You moved slowly but determined as you knew that you couldn’t let yourself to back away. You had to do what none of the previous versions of you, your past lives couldn’t do.   
Opening the door you were met with a still asleep body. Ivar was sleeping on his back just the same as before you left the bed. His face was relaxed with no sign of any wrinkles on it, he was calm while you were shaking, and he was at peace while the Devil was running through your mind.   
Slowly you moved to the side of the bed climbing on it with the knife still gripped tightly, however the grip was loosening with every second that passed by. You knew what had to be done but longer you waited more you didn’t want to do it, but it seemed as you had to make your decision quickly as Ivar was waking up.

He was on the line between the dream and reality when piercing pain struck his body.  He couldn’t move as the air was taken from his lungs. His eyes were barely open as he stared at his attacker through his eyelashes. He tried to speak while tears slid from his eyes as he stared at the woman he loved, the woman who was pulling out the knife from his chest.   
It wasn’t the physical pain which froze his body and took away his ability to speak; no it was sadness, shock, and betrayal. It seemed as if you never even loved him; as if these past weeks you were only waiting for him to completely relax so that you could kill him. He loved you, he loves you and you were ready to kill him and in a few minutes after he bleeds out you will kill him, you will be his murderer, but still, he won’t die. With that knowledge although he was dying he couldn’t understand what will happen next, he couldn’t understand if after he wakes up will you still be there or will you have to die again for him to see you.   
However, all of those thoughts stopped for a moment as he was watching you turning around the knife.  
He didn’t take time to think what was happening he reacted immediately. Ivar pushed you on your back tearing the knife away from your grip and while fighting him to take it back you both hit the ground.   
You were lying on the ground just a few inches from each other as Ivar felt fingers wrapping around his. He tore his gaze from the abandoned knife looking at you only to stare in shock as your shirt was stained with blood. The blood was moving as the river quickly soaking into your shirt. He couldn’t understand as he knew that you didn’t succeed in hurting yourself, but as he felt you tighten your fingers around him and moving your body closer to him he finally looked to your face.  
Your face was stained with trails of tears and you had a weak smile on your face. Your eyes were barely opened as you stared at him; you reached towards his face whispering: “Valhalla is waiting for us,” however before your fingers could reach his skin your hand hit the ground.  
It was over, again. Again you were taken away and it seems as again it was your wish to leave him.


	10. Chapter 10

_The bright rays of the sun were falling onto his skin, warming his body. The rays were gently dancing against his skin, tickling his face while his eyes stayed closed escaping from everything around him. The soft crashing of the waves was along the chirping of the birds the only sound close to him. He could hear people far away from him, so far that they actually weren’t disrupting his few minutes of being alone. He was far away from life, from anyone who would question him as he was trying for just a few seconds forget that indeed he was all alone, but not only here but everywhere he goes. There was nobody truly there for him._

_He was just a second from opening his eyes when something crashed into his body. Blinking away he saw the familiar silhouette of the girl he was avoiding for the past two days. She looked like an angel as the sunlight fell around her body making her glow. He was struck at the moment just staring at her not even noticing the way her lips moved as she was sitting beside him, nothing. He only looked back at her away from his daydream after she tugged at his shirt to get his attention._  
“What?” Ivar asked annoyed.  
“You are avoiding me,” you stated as you watched him sit up. You even brushed away sand from the back of his shirt while waiting for his response.  
“No,” Ivar simply said with his eyes fixed on the calm water, far away from yours.   
“You are lying to me,” you said as you placed your fingers on his chin forcing him to look at you.   
“No,” he said again with the same emptiness in his voice while he glanced down still not meeting your eyes.  
“You are being stupid,” you told him after letting your fingers fall from his chin.  
“No.”  
“What is wrong with you?” you questioned, worried about him.  
“Really?” Ivar asked as his gaze moved to his legs and you rolled your eyes at him as he knew that you weren’t talking about them, you would never say or think something like that.  
“I didn’t mean it like that.”  
“Sure you didn’t,” he said under his breath.  
“What happened Ivar? ”  
“Nothing,” he said dismissingly yet again.   
“I will throw you in the water if you don’t tell me,” you warned moving closer to him as if to seem more intimidating.   
“You are weak,” he stated finally meeting your eyes.   
“Do you want to test me?” you questioned the man before you as you were done with his behavior. He wasn’t a child anymore but a man and yet still he acted like a child.   
“You will never be strong.”  
“Will you stop it?” you screamed at his offended by his statement.   
“Stop what? Telling you the truth?” he asked nonchalantly while knowing how his words hurt you, but he did it as he needed you to hurt him. He couldn’t still believe that you never hate him, or that you never think ill of him, he just needed you to hurt him, to prove himself that nobody actually really loves him and that he is truly all alone.   
“What did he tell you this time?”  
“Nothing.”  
“Then be like this, be alone Ivar, push everyone away, die alone!” you screamed with venom laced in your voice and hatred on your face which Ivar could see clearly.  
“Better that than having you near me,” he said silently as for the first time in his life he saw hatred on your face, hatred towards him and it broke him, but he was the one pushing you to that.  
“Is that really how you feel?”  
“Are you going to cry now?” he mocked still not able to just stop and apologize.   
“I will never cry over something you say, I will never shed a tear for you, just go crawl in the ocean and drown!” you said loudly but calmly making the blood in his body freeze.   
“What?” he whispered completely defeated and at the loss of words.  
“You heard me Ivar, I hate you and I wish you would die.”  
“Why would you say that?”  
“For years I’ve been standing by your side, you are not worth it,” you simply shrugged while your fingers moved to the handle of your blade.  
“Do you re-”  
“Die! Just die already!” you screamed as you pierced a dagger into his chest.   
His eyes got wide as his gaze moved from the dagger to you. Your eyes were void from emotions as if you were completely empty and as he reached towards you there was nothing left to grab, you were no longer there.   


______________________________________________________________

He was startled from his sleep by a nightmare. His heart was beating fast as the memories of his dream were still very much present, but not just from there but what happened as well. His nightmare was born from what happened, from what will hunt him until the Gods stop punishing him. However, he knew that there won’t happen any time soon.   
He was lying on the soft ground staring at the sun, not even for a second questioning how he got there, he only questioned if he will ever see you again as again you did it on your own. He could remember the feeling of despair the last time when he didn’t know if you had been taken forever.   
Now, just as then he could only hope or maybe be less selfish and let you live your life, however, he knew that he will never decide that.   
As his eyes got tired from staring at the sky he finally lifted his back from the ground only for his eyes to grow wide. There was nothing familiar around him although it made him feel as if he was at that place once before. Considering how old he was it was possible that he had seen this cliff once before.   
But it wasn’t only the cliff which was awakening something in him but the clothes which he only now noticed. He wasn’t wearing some normal shirt and pants; no he was wearing what he used to wear when he was surrounded with his family; when he was growing up with you.  
His fingers moved over the metal around his legs as he stared in confusion, he was so confused and lost that he failed to notice that he wasn’t alone. Just a few feet away from him a woman stood, somebody he knew but still at the moment failed to notice.  
Ivar stood up with his crutch for the support when he almost fell as his eyes locked with the woman before him. He never thought that he will ever see her again, but here she was, with her long hair neatly braided and one of her favorite dresses gracing her body.   
“Mother?” Ivar whispered still too scared to move as he still didn’t understand what was happening. It could be another dream and he was frightened that if he does something wrong that his mother would disappear, that again she would be taken from his life.  
“Don’t be scared,” Aslaug said offering him her hand.   
It took Ivar a moment or two to finally move from his spot, moving slowly towards his mother and the closed doors which were placed beside her.   
Aslaug didn’t even give Ivar time for him to hug her before she had opened the doors and the warmth from the inside was left out.  
He could hear words being spoken, stories being said, and voices calling out to each other, but not just any voices those were familiar voices.  
His mother urged him to come in but he was reluctant he only stepped in after hearing his mother’s voice again.  
“She is waiting for you.”  
And indeed his mother wasn’t lying because as he stepped in, the silence fell upon everyone; all of the warriors beside whom he fought, most importantly his family; his father, his brothers, their children.  
Ivar didn’t even notice that he was crying and the warmth which filled his heart, but what he noticed next made him fall to his knees. There you were standing at the beginning of the long table with the precious infant wrapped safely in your hands.  
This wasn’t a new chance for Ivar, this wasn’t a gift from the Gods. This was the way it should’ve been, this was what was taken from him and it wasn’t given back by those who took it, it was given to him by you. It was given to him by a woman who loved him so much that she was ready to kill both of them to save them although the Gods could’ve punished her for it.


End file.
